19 October 2021

OVERCOMING SOCIAL ANXIETY

Being anxious is having a feeling of worry, nervousness or unease about something with an uncertain outcome or an uncomfortable feeling of nervousness or worry about something that is happening or might happen in the future. It causes a feeling of fear and worries which sometimes can be an unhealthy situation.

Being socially anxious is having the fear of being judged and evaluated negatively by other people and it’s more than just shyness or occasional nerves. Social anxiety involves intense fear of certain social situations—especially situations that are unfamiliar or in which you feel you’ll be watched or evaluated by others, leading to feelings of inadequacy, inferiority, self-consciousness, embracement, humiliation and sometimes depression.

If you feel intensely uncomfortable in social situations or you always find yourself sweating and shaking when you’re thinking of attending any social gathering especially the once you aren’t familiar with then you might be socially anxious. Something you must understand is “to every problem there’s always a solution and in whatever situation you are, there’re most likely millions of people in that same situation as you” so just relax, take a deep breath and we’ll be talking about how to overcome social anxiety. Some ways this can be done are:

  1. Remind Yourself That We’re All Humans; Realize that everyone else is a human being just like you are, weather big or small no one is perfect. Constantly remind yourself that:
  • It’s impossible to please everyone because some people simply can’t be pleased no matter what you do. They either just don’t like you or they just don’t like your work without a specific or logical reason.
  • Everybody on planet earth has their own opinion, some even make sure to give you theirs even when you don’t need it and in some cases this can be helpful except they’re just doing it to bring you down (aka toxic people).
  • Opinions aren’t facts; just because someone thinks something should be done in a certain way doesn’t mean it’s the best way, the only way or that it’s even right.
  • If something doesn’t make you happy then it’s not worth doing.
  • Most people won’t help or support you so why do you care if they’re pleased or not? No matter how much you try to please certain kind of people they won’t offer you a hand when you need help.
  • Life has a lot to offer when you play by your own rules.
  • There’re people worth pleasing, those who are close to you but you have to learn to identify those people because (there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. “Proverbs 18:24”) even family members can take advantage of you.

2. Get Yourself Out There; Although it can be tempting to avoid social and performance situations, it is very important to get yourself out there;

  • Get familiar with social places or environments.
  • Accept invitations to go places.
  • Do things that make you uncomfortable but ensure it’s for the purpose of handling and overcoming the problem not just to please anyone.
  • Try a new activity.
  • Go out alone and independently.
  • Make friends with strangers.
  • Organize a social event.
  • Give someone a compliment.
  • Stand up and speak your mind.
  • Be active on social media.

3. Start Small; Great things always start small, everything in the world starts small and then becomes bigger—except bad things. They start big, and then get smaller. Starting small builds your momentum and confidence. When you think big, break the idea down into smaller pieces for testing. For example:

  • Keep a Journal {so you can see how much you have improved and when you might be falling back into old habits}.
  • Improve your health {Ensure that poor physical health is not contributing to your problems with anxiety}.
  • Set goals {Put your goals down on paper, it makes them real and measurable. Decide where you want to end up by learning and setting a benchmark of where you are now}.
  • Congratulate yourself {Feel good about the small accomplishments in your life}.
  • Become your best advocate {Nobody else is going to look out for you the way you can look out for yourself because nobody else knows what it is like to be you}.
  • Cherish being alone “study our article on overcoming loneliness
  • Stop trying to be perfect.

4. Be Generous With Your Energy; Generosity isn’t necessarily about money. It’s about so much more, including our overall approach to life. It may be the gifts of time, material things, encouragement etc. Being generous helps you feel incredibly good and sometimes fabulous. Try:

  • Considering the benefits of generosity; it produces within us a sense that we are capable of making a difference in the world, that we are actively addressing the needs of those around us and that we are shaping our community into a healthier one.
  • Finding ways to make others feel better about them (Cautiously).
  • Demonstrating generosity through giving and honoring God.
  • Learning from generous people.
  • Appreciating other’s generosity.

Social anxiety just like every other difficult situation in life may seem impossible to deal with and overcome but never forget “One step at a time is all it takes to get you there- Emily Dickinson”.

What The Bible Says About Social Anxiety:

“And when they bring you before the synagogues and the magistrates and the authorities, do not be anxious [beforehand] how you shall reply in defense or what you are to say…

For the Holy Spirit will teach you in that very hour and moment what [you] ought to say” – Luke 12:11-12 [AMP].

“Do not give heed to everything that is said, lest you hear your servant cursing you” – Ecclesiastes 7:21 [AMP].

“Not forsaking or neglecting to assemble together [as believers], as is the habit of some people, but admonishing (warning, urging, and encouraging) one another, and all the more faithfully as you see the day approaching” – Hebrews 10:25 [AMP].

“The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand [the side not carrying a shield]” – Psalm 121:5 [AMP].

“The Lord is on my side; I will not fear. What can man do to me?” – Psalm 118:6 [AMP].

“Yes, though I walk through the [deep, sunless] valley of the shadow of death, I will fear or dread no evil, for you are with me; your rod [to protect] and your staff [to guide], they comfort me” – Psalm 23:4 [AMP].

“Have not I commanded you? Be strong, vigorous, and very courageous. Be not afraid, neither be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go” – Joshua 1:9 [AMP]

Prof!

This Blog was created to help contain and subdue the ongoing increase in depression and suicidal thought pattern happening mostly among youths in our world today. A lot of us are quick to compare our lives with that of those around us thereby ignoring and undermining our own uniqueness. We want to let you know that no matter how different or weird you think you are, you are special both on the inside and on the outside.

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